The loss of a child is the most heart-wrenching pain for a parent to endure. How can one cope?
Blending memoir, love story, and transformative journey, Kim Han shares the experience of losing her beloved daughter, Siu-Ling, and 8 gentle tools that can soothe the ragged edges of our broken hearts.
The loss of a child is the most heart-wrenching pain for a parent to endure. How does one cope with such a loss?
“Blending memoir with personal and professional insights into how to live with loss, Kim Han honours her beautiful daughter Siu Ling and, in the process, gently offers readers tools for coping.”
Dr Madeleine Cole MD CCFP FCFP
Assistant Professor, Memorial University of Newfoundland
Assistant Professor, Department of Family Medicine
University of Ottawa
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Honor your lost loved one and soothe the ragged edges of your broken heart
The loss of a loved one is the most heart-wrenching pain for anyone to endure. It breaks your heart; it tears you apart and shatters your hopes and dreams for the future.
How do you survive the indescribable pain of such a loss?
How and where do you find solace for your broken heart?
By reading this thought-provoking, poignant story, you will discover how to:
Become aware of the healing powers surrounding us that we tend to take for granted
Empower yourself to take control of your healing and your life
Open your heart to the subtle messages of love that transcends all dimensions
Recognize the often undiagnosed physical impact of losing a loved one known as takotsubo cardiomyopathy or broken heart syndrome
Navigate the different stages of grief and find healing - even meaning - in the loss of your loved one.
The ones we love who have gone before us are all around us, if we only know where to look, for love never dies.
Sometimes even in the mists of grief, the universe will send us a gift that changes our world once again.
The way through the sadness and grief that comes from great loss is to use it as motivation and to generate a deeper sense of purpose (Dalai Lama)
WHAT PEOPLE ARE SAYING
Kim’s story guides us through a journey of loss, struggle, and perseverance. A truly comforting read for grieving parents.
— Leahanne Prolas, MEd, Registered Psychotherapist & Counselor
This book is a heartwarming and heartbreaking tribute to a remarkable woman written by her equally remarkable mother. Most importantly, this is a wonderful example of healthy grief through nurturing the living bond that exists with our loved ones long after they leave our physical world as they continue to impact all who knew them.
— Dr. Debbie McAllister, Anesthesia & Palliative Care Expert, Clinical Associate Professor at the Cumming School of Medicine, University of Calgary
This is an exquisite love story...that of a mother for her dying daughter and the journey through shattered hearts to wholeness. Prepare to go deep within yourself as you witness the twists and turns of dying too young and how a mother finds her way forward. Tears will flow as your heart is renewed by the power of love in this lifetime...and beyond. This is a book you don't want to miss.
— Dr. Kymn Harvin, Grief Counselor and author of The Soul of America Speaks: Wisdom for Healing and Moving Forward
“Totally moved from tears to inspiration.”
As a person who has been through loss and grief of my own, I have been totally moved from tears to inspiration by Kim Han’s wonderful book: I Am With You Everywhere - Finding Solace in the Mists of Grief. I am so uplifted and inspired by the wisdom and amazingness of Siu-Ling, powerfully and lovingly shared by her mother and from all of Kim’s journey through her own grief to be able to bring us this transformational and uplifting book that has certainly helped me. I will be happy and grateful to share this book with my clients, friends and colleagues.
— Gary Nobuo Niki, Shamanic Samurai Medicine Man & author of d.i.y. zen and The Art of Gentle Emotional Transformation www.GaryNiki.com
Kim Han shares a parent’s worst experience in simple, powerful language. Acknowledging her own heartache, she examines various techniques for climbing out of the abyss of raw pain and grief.
— Madeleine McDonald, author of A Shackled Inheritance
I Am with You Everywhere: Finding Solace in the Mists of Grief is not only a beautiful tribute to Kim’s beloved daughter Siu-Ling but such an honest and vulnerable sharing of what a mother goes through when she loses a child. Through Kim’s story, those experiencing grief will see someone else who has experienced the deepest levels of sadness and despair and has managed to keep moving forward and find moments of joy and peace.
Kim’s book offers hope as she shares many different strategies that helped her, and she is so encouraging to others going through grief, letting them know that they too can get through this. All of these strategies are not only supported by research, but I have seen them help my clients who are experiencing grief in my coaching practice.
— Patricia Barrett-Robillard, RN, BScN, MNRS. Cancer Coach at the Ottawa Regional Cancer Foundation
Grief. Love. Loss. Healing. Stillness. Movement. I feel honored to be able to read this amazing book. Deep feelings about love and loss, heartbreak and healing came pouring in. I laughed, cried, and felt incredible love and energy course through me while I read. I felt Siu-Ling hold me and comfort me, telling me everything was alright.
In I Am With You Everywhere: Finding Solace in the Mists of Grief, we are invited into Kim’s home and life and are well cared for as visitors, feeling and healing alongside her. I feel more connected, somehow, to everything and everyone. I am more present with my own grief and can better receive my lessons on life. Thank you, Kim, for sharing this most intimate offering, I am so appreciative of this gift.
— Michael Overlie, Canine-Partnered Energy Coach, Energy Healer and Author of Let Your Dog Lead.
A mother writes with love about her daughter. Perhaps inevitably, the result is elegantly poetic.
There is a man best known for his account of The Legend of John Hornby, surely one of the North’s greatest, albeit tragic, stories. In his day job, George Whalley was a university professor of English whose 1953 book Poetic Process describes “symbolic extrication” as the means by which the writer releases herself from “an intolerable reality.” This is what Kim Han seeks with her new book, while “finding solace in the mists of grief.” Poetry is the language of love; without doubt, this is Kim Han’s love poem to her daughter.
Losing a child is an insufferable pain; few of us can really understand this. I do; that we share, this mother and I, though we have never met. I celebrate the effort Kim Han makes here to confront her loss, to give Siu-Ling’s life greater meaning, and to impart to others the lesson that love never dies. It is a very, very personal story – for some, perhaps almost too much to bear – but it will not fail to inspire you to contemplate the sheer joy of life.
~David F. Pelly, author of The Ancestors Are Happy and several other books about the North, the land, its people, and their history. Co-Founder of the Ayalik Fund, a charitable initiative to support Inuit youth. www.AyalikFund.ca
More Endorsements
Kim Han shares her deeply personal and touching story of her daughter’s life before and after her passing at the age of 53 from ovarian cancer. A brand of grief that only a parent can know, she shows how she navigated this difficult passage to “ease the ragged edges of a broken heart.” Kim opens to the inspiration that her daughter’s life provided her and shares how she eventually found meaning in the loss. An inspiring story that reminds us that love truly never dies.
~ Pam Culley-McCullough, Ed.D. Author of The Promise of Soul Love, Unexpected Gifts from Here and Beyond
I have come to realize through multiple experiences that when one transitions from bodily form, the Love and Light that is true and ever-present lives on everywhere. Kim Han, in this precious account of her daughter's adventurous and love-filled life and passing, is testament to that realization. Your journey through Kim's story with her beloved Siu-Ling will inspire you to realize there is indeed solace and peace in the mists of grief. Siu-Ling's and Kim's sense of adventure, courage, and deep love jump off every page and have stayed with me since having the pleasure of experiencing this beautiful book.
~Rev. Cathy Silva, Author, Coach and Founder of Live Your Life in Love Ministry
With tenderness and strength, author and grieving mother Kim Han takes the reader through the life and death of her daughter, Siu-Ling, who died of cancer at 53 in 2016. In I Am with You Everywhere, Han talks about how she survived the loss of her daughter, who was an accomplished researcher, dog team musher, singer, songwriter, and friend, and she shares that hard-earned knowledge in this book.
~ Jane George, longtime northern journalist and friend of Siu-Ling
Kim Han’s book is an inspiring tribute to her daughter, Siu-Ling, and how she lived an extraordinary life both before and after her cancer diagnosis. She loved the outdoors and continued doing many things that brought her joy, including skiing, hiking, wilderness camping and dogsledding, which helped her to live another 13 years after her diagnosis. Even though Siu-Ling has passed, her story is a wonderful reminder to fully embrace life and living, no matter what challenges you may be facing.
~Leslie Bridger, author of Alive and Thriving: Miraculous Healing Above and Beyond the Odds
PROCEEDS
“What we once deeply loved, we can never lose. For all that we deeply love becomes a part of us.” — Helen Keller
All proceeds of this book are donated to the Ilisaqsivik Society in Clyde River, Nunavut, a community-led nonprofit Inuit organization and Canadian charity supporting the physical, emotional, spiritual, and mental wellbeing of Inuit suffering from mental health issues, addiction, and trauma.
Kim has also established a Siu-Ling Han Memorial scholarship for an Inuit student studying Environmental Technology at Nunavut's Arctic College in Iqaluit, where Siu-Ling lived for almost twenty years.
ALSO BY KIM HAN
ABOUT AUTHOR KIM HAN
I wonder what it feels like to do something and know it’s for the last time?
I wrote I Am with You Everywhere: Finding Solace in the Mists of Grief to honour our daughter Siu-Ling, her life, work, and love for the Arctic, where she lived for almost two decades, surrounded by the love of her many friends, colleagues, and beloved sled dogs.
I also wrote it for people grieving the loss of a child, someone close to them, someone they love and care about. Many books have been written about the pain of losing a loved one. Losing someone we love is part of living. Each book tells a different story. In I am With You Everywhere, I am sharing the strategies that helped me soothe the ragged edges of my broken heart when I lost my beloved daughter. I hope that anybody who has lost someone they love will find some solace as they go through their darkest moments. The pain will never go away and memories will linger but, when memories start bringing smiles to our faces, we can move out of the darkness and into the light, as we find comfort in realizing that love never dies.
Photo credits: Pierrre Lecomte, Debbie McAllister, Ed Maruyama, Thomas Godfrey.